Fun with Spam


This is an homage to my buddy Adie and her obsession with Spam.

Here is my attempt to make coherent (ok, vaguely coherent) paragraphs by piecing together spam subject lines……

Overwhelmed with debt? Want College Financial Aid? Want Cash? Quick Cash Now! A way to make money so easy even a Stupid Idiot could do it! $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ Get paid to play with your food! You can afford AMAZING BREASTS!!!

Need a HOT WIFE? Get one from Russia 😉 XOXOXOXO …HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THE WOMEN FROM RUSSIA?!? Hurry! – 48 Hours Only Sale. New Customers only. Packages start as low as $29.99/mo.

We just had to tell you…You’re not crazy, Everything is really FREE! CONGRATULATIONS! Someone Thinks You Are Dumb. How dumb are you? B-I-N-G-O!

Check out the diet that changed a housewife’s life. You probably have ROTTEN JUNK inside your body. The Finest Fruit for Your Body – Tiny Sweetheart Treats & Irresistible Cheesecakes Burn more fat sitting on the couch than walking around the block.

Feel like you will NEVER be loved? Help is here! Guess Who…Has a Crush on You? Meet someone sexy tonight. My Name is Nick Marks. I’m One of Those Internet Guys I’m 26 Years Old, with a Wife and 4 Kids and The Internet. Does Size Really Matter? COME SEE MY PICS! Do You Wanna Go on a Date or not?!? You will be approved – Guaranteed.

I found you a new job POLICE OFFICERS NEEDED Have you ever thought of becoming a POLICE OFFICER? Help prevent terrorist attacks! Spice up your life. Meet good girls and ones that are NOT THAT INNOCENT! Do You Accept The Challenge?

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